Last Tuesday, a man in our rock and roll dance class looked frustrated. He had been attending for a few weeks but was still struggling with the steps. Switching partners as we rotated only seemed to add to his discomfort.
When it was my turn to dance with him, I could see the tension in his shoulders, the hesitation before each move. He was overwhelmed, embarrassed, and clearly disappointed in himself. I recognized that feeling, the weight of self doubt creeping in.
For those who are hard on themselves, moments like these can feel unbearable. It is easy to think, Why am I not getting this? What is wrong with me? But in that frustration, we often forget something important. Self compassion is not a luxury. It is a necessity.
No one walks into a dance class, a new job, or even life itself knowing exactly what to do. We all start as beginners, uncertain, hesitant, maybe even a little lost. But struggle is not failure. It is proof that we are growing. The real difference between those who give up and those who improve is not talent or speed. It is how they treat themselves when they struggle.
Some people may pick up things more easily than others, but talent is never a reason for arrogance. It is an opportunity for kindness. Growth is not a race. Instead of judging ourselves or others, we should remind each other that learning looks different for everyone.
Rather than standing back in silent judgment, we can step forward in encouragement. We can offer a smile, a reassuring word, or simply the patience to let someone find their rhythm at their own pace. And just as we extend compassion to others, we must give it to ourselves. A moment of grace, saying It is okay, I am still learning, can be the difference between persistence and giving up.
We live in a world that often pushes us to perform, to be perfect, to meet impossible standards. But imagine how much lighter the journey would feel if we were not so hard on ourselves, if we reminded each other that struggling is part of the process, not a sign to stop.
Everyone starts from somewhere. And with self compassion and encouragement, we do not just improve. We thrive.
So be kind to yourself. Be kind to others. You are learning. They are learning. We all are.
If this resonates with you, share it with someone who needs a little encouragement today.
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